<meta name='google-adsense-platform-account' content='ca-host-pub-1556223355139109'/> <meta name='google-adsense-platform-domain' content='blogspot.com'/> <!-- --><style type="text/css">@import url(//www.blogger.com/static/v1/v-css/navbar/3334278262-classic.css); div.b-mobile {display:none;} </style> </head><body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/platform.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar/3593748936968310104?origin\x3dhttps://ecstasy-drive.blogspot.com', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>
Main
Profile
Tagboard
Affiliates
Layout
I hate battles.
Sunday, 20 November 2011


Sorry I haven't been blogging . I've been sick with depression and an eating disorder. I know I'm probably gonna lose some followers on twitter if you guys see this but I don't really care, because I know those who stand by me will always be there.
So yeah. What are your views on eating disorders?

I'm currently 5'1 / 156cm and I weigh 108lbs / 49 kg.
But whenever I look into a mirror or see my own reflection all I see is fat. I don't know when this obsession with weight started but it's starting to freak me out. I want to eat so bad but whenever I see food this voice in my head tells me to stop eating because I'm so ugly, and that if I kept eating everyone would start hating me BECAUSE I am ugly.



See that picture above? It's something I'll never be.
I'll never have a tummy as flat as those [although I really want to]
I'll never have those abs.
All I will have is fats.
And that's enough to make me want to kill myself.




sigh xo






back to top